11Jan

Doomsday Clock Inches A Minute Closer To Midnight

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Because humanity is determined to have an apocalypse this year one way or another, scientists have moved the nuclear doomsday clock forward a minute to 11:55. Quick — we should probably make out while there’s still time! “No way, you smell like booze.” Yeah but you’re uuuuugly.

“It is five minutes to midnight. Two years ago [when the clock was reversed to 6-minutes to midnight], it appeared that world leaders might address the truly global threats that we face. In many cases, that trend has not continued or been reversed. For that reason, the Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists is moving the clock hand one minute closer to midnight, back to its time in 2007.”

So yeah, apparently world leaders aren’t addressing global threats and that’s why they moved it forward. Or — OR — was it because the drive-thru girl at Taco Bell got my order wrong and I threatened “to blow this shithole planet up like Alderaan”? I was honking my horn and yelling, people might’ve heard!

Doomsday Clock moves 1 minute closer to catastrophe [cnet]

Thanks to sam, Patrick88 and Karen, who don’t care when the world ends as long as they get 24 hours notice. Me? Four hours and a stomach full of boner pills. View full post on Geekologie – Gadgets, Gizmos, and Awesome

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06Dec

Forget Them, Skip Straight To The Dinos!: Scientists One Step Closer To Mammoth Cloning

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Determined to keep good on their promise to clone mammoths in the near future, scientists claim they’re one step closer after finding well preserved marrow in the thighbone of a specimen during a recent dig. No word if anybody’s tried making mammoth broth with it yet.

By transplanting nuclei taken from the marrow cells into elephant egg cells whose nuclei have been removed through a cloning technique, embryos with a mammoth gene could be produced and planted into elephant wombs, as the two species are close relatives, they said.

But cell nuclei are usually damaged or have not been kept in a frozen state even when they have been found in a good overall condition, a Russian museum official said.

This time, however, there is a high likelihood that biologically active nuclei can be extracted as the frozen marrow found when museum scientists cut open the thighbone Nov. 13 was fresh and in excellent condition, according to the official.

Oh man, can you imagine the look on the husband elephant’s face when his wife gives birth to a mammoth? I bet you didn’t even think of that, did you, scientists? HOMEWRECKERS! That said, I’m ready and willing to carry a dino baby to full term. Call Text Sext me.

Scientists a step closer to cloning mammoth [japantimes]

Thanks to Bradley, Pesche and Sam, who agree mammoths are just hairy elephants AND A WASTE OF OUR CLONING RESOURCES. View full post on Geekologie – Gadgets, Gizmos, and Awesome

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24Nov

AT&T Takes Two Steps Back With Hopes To Inch Closer To T-Mo Deal

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Well, this isn’t the strategy I was expecting, but it seems the FCC’s request to investigate the AT&T/T-Mobile deal under the lens of an administrative law judge last week just doesnt sit well with AT&T. Rather than be scrutinized, the company has instead withdrawn its application for the merger. But don’t let that confuse you. Buying Deutsche Telekom AG’s T-Mobile is still big blue’s end goal — the FCC just happens to be blocking the road at the moment.

What may be more interesting is that AT&T’s confidence seems to be dwindling. According to an official release, the company agreed to pay a $4 billion pre-tax charge on its fourth quarter accountancy sheet, which is the exact amount it would owe to affected parties should the deal fall through. $3 billion in cash would go to Deutsche Telekom as a default payment, while another $1 billion would go to the book value of spectrum that big blue would be forced to relinquish.

In other words, AT&T is preparing for the worst in a very real way. Well, the worst for them, not necessarily the worst case scenario for everyone.

What I find most interesting is that AT&T decided to release this information on Thanksgiving. Maybe they assumed we media types would be stuffing our faces with stuffing (ha!). Either way, AT&T is still putting on a brave face, officially stating the following:

AT&T Inc. and Deutsche Telekom AG are continuing to pursue the sale of Deutsche Telekom’s U.S. wireless assets to AT&T and are taking this step to facilitate the consideration of all options at the FCC and to focus their continuing efforts on obtaining antitrust clearance for the transaction from the Department of Justice either through the litigation pending before the United States District Court for the District of Columbia, Case No. 1:11-cv-01560 (ESH) or alternate means. As soon as practical, AT&T Inc. and Deutsche Telekom AG intend to seek the necessary FCC approval.

The question now is, will a deal between AT&T and T-Mobile ever really be “practical”?



View full post on TechCrunch » Mobile

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02Nov

THE SKY IS FALLING!: Asteroid To Pass Closer To Earth Than The Moon Next Week

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According to astronomers, next Tuesday an asteroid the size of an aircraft carrier (~1,300-feet for those of you who don’t like your measurements in naval vessels) will pass closer to earth than the moon’s orbit, hopefully polishing off humanity like the dinosaurs. *readying tractor-beam* “Um, GW — what the f*** are you doing?” YOU STAY OUT OF THIS.

The asteroid, dubbed 2005 YU55, will come within 202,000 miles of Earth, closer than the moon, before zipping farther into space. Carbon-colored and dark, the asteroid measures some 1,300 feet wide. It will be the closest visit by a space rock this size in more than three decades.

“This is not a potentially hazardous asteroid, just a good opportunity to study one,” National Science Foundation astronomer Thomas Statler says. NASA and the NSF plan a series of radar telescope and other observations starting Friday, aimed at mapping the asteroid’s surface and chemistry.

Well, what do you think? “…A leather belt with rocks glued to it?” It’s an asteroid belt. It’s a shame Halloween was Monday because this has ‘first place in a costume contest’ written all over it. “Wow, it literally does.” Haha, sometimes you have to do the judges’ thinking for them.

Asteroid 2005 YU55 will zip by Earth next week [usatoday]

Thanks to Jennie, who agrees now would be a great time to start a cult.

View full post on Geekologie – Gadgets, Gizmos, and Awesome

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10Oct

Smell-O-Vision: One Step Closer To Reality

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Mmmm, love the smell of Kratos in the morning. Smells like…ashes :/

You ever wanted to smell whatever you’re watching in a movie? Cheap perfume, sweat and shame. Get it? Because you’re watching p0rno. Me? I’m watching cartoons, which are actually like p0rno to some people because, I dunno, they weren’t allowed to watch Saturday morning cartoons growing up or something. DO I LOOK LIKE A PSYCHOLOGIST TO YOU?! “Not with that crash helmet on, no.” Exactly, I’m clearly a stuntman. This is SMELLIT, a system that mixes and disperses fragrances to coincide with a movie.

The SMELLIT (yes, that is seriously it’s name) is a new gadget from French company Olf-action (as in “olefaction”, get it?) and it’s designed to add “the smell dimension” to various forms of digital entertainment. And given the face that Olf-action already makes a smell-syncronization system for movie theaters called Odoravision, there’s a good chance this is going to be made into an actual product you can buy someday.

Admittedly, I would feel a little more comfortable breaking wind in the theater if there was a SMELLIT system in place. Because right now all I can do is cover the noise by laughing and talking really loud. AHAHHAHAHAH *brap* THE NOTEBOOK — GOD I LOVE THIS MOVIE.

Hit the jump for a couple more shots, including some of the smells the thing can make (like naked bodies and the dentist!) View full post on Geekologie – Gadgets, Gizmos, and Awesome

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